Not a classic

GALAXY DINER
3320 Henderson Mill Rd.
Atlanta GA 30341


I recently moved to a new part of town giving me a chance to find new neighborhood places to eat, drink, whatever....

Well, being a Sunday after a long night, I felt the need to go check out one of the places to help make me feel a little better. One of my roommates, Kristina, and I decided to check out Galaxy Diner. As we drove up, we were surprised to see the parking lot full of classic and custom cars. Once we got in though, we saw that there was a meeting for members of a local classic and custom cars club that seems to be sponsored by the diner. The interior had pictures to decorate the walls of member's cars that had been given different awards.

Anyways, on to the food...

The menu was huge and had a good variety of dishes. Cold sandwiches, hot sandwiches, breakfast, gyros, pasta, burgers and more. Because I don't think I've had a burger since the last review, I decided to go for the bacon cheeseburger (which I didn't realize until halfway through the burger that they forgot the bacon). Once it came out I noticed it was yet another place that uses the frozen patties. Already kind of a downer in my opinion, but today, it didn't matter. Overall, it was very plain. The bun tasted like it had more flavor than burger itself. I think I'd give the burger another chance due to the fact that we did get there a little before they were scheduled to close, but still let us eat since the car club meeting wasn't going to end for a little while. Next time I go, I'll be sure to follow up to see if it was a one time bad burger. Either way, there's bound to be something good with the American/Greek/Italian menu.

-Bobby!

ACME "A Company that Makes Everything"

ACME BURGER COMPANY
Bloor & Bathurst
500 Bloor St. West
Toronto, Ontario
(416) 850-8499


ACME BURGER COMPANY MISSION:
"We strive to provide the greatest quality of fresh and tasty food, served quickly to the customers, at a reasonable price"

ok....

DEAR ACME BURGER,
We were very excited to have your burger shop move into the Annex. Saturday was my friend Stephen's birthday, and I decided to treat him to lunch there. We were first confused as to where to order when we walked in. Figuring it out, the nice (but extremely pushy) cashier took our order. Priced at $7.99 for a combo is reasonable. We were then directed around the corner to the burger station, where like Harvey's, you get to pick all your toppings, and see them going on your hamburger. The girl working the station was terribly frustrated, backed up with orders, and didn't hide it well at all. On top of it, the man working the grill wasn't communicating with her, so things got backed up more. We waited and waited....

Because there was no designated line or system in place, it turned into a clusterfuck of people hanging around waiting for their order number to be called. When it was, they'd push through the crowd to get to the station window. We got our burgers made (not impressively, at all! I had to ask for more lettuce, due to her putting the wimpiest leaf of lettuce ever on), however our onion rings were not ready --- until 3/4 of the way through our lunch. Uggh.

My Acme burger was a 6oz. Angus beef burger, topped with lettuce, cheese, tomato, ketchup and garlic mayo, on a really soft seasoned egg bun. The first few bites were mostly a charred grilled taste - not bad, but a bit burnt tasting. Near the center it got better. It wasn't awful, but not memorable by any means. Also, it was DRIPPING grease. Wtf? Kinda grossed me out.

In conclusion, after the hype that has been surrounding this new burger joint coming North, I'm sorry to say, but it was nothing special at all. Besides the mediocre food, you absolutely need to hire more staff, implement a working assembly line system and maybe get a rope or something to cue a line.

The word acme means highest level, or top of the line - Acme Burger Company, you do have a lot of potential to be great, but there's tons of work that needs to happen before that can be achieved. Thank you for having me though.

yours truly,
Hamburger Holmes

1/2 sized burgers

LIBERTY GROUP (catering)
25 British Columbia Road
Toronto, ON
(416) 542-3789


I TOLD YOU!! Holiday Parties = mini-burgers!
In this case, they were more like 1/2 burgers, catered to us by the Liberty Group, in Toronto. I found them to be a bit chewy - served with cheese and ketchup, these burgers were under debates at the party as to whether they were ground up steak or just regular ground beef. If they were cooked a little less, they'd have been perfect. Probably the best of mini burgers I've tried though.

If you are feeling fancy (and rich) call on Liberty Group to cater your next party. Besides the hamburgers, all the other food was absolutely amazing!

MMMMMM&M's

M&M's MEAT SHOP
http://www.mmmeatshops.com/


Tasty Burgers from M&M's Meat Shop are juicy ground beef, seasoned to perfection, and sized just right to slap on a bun, load up with the good stuff, and still fit into hungry mouths.

Hermano Darren liked them so much, he ate two!!

East Side Mario's

EAST SIDE MARIO'S
12 Lebovic Avenue
Scarborough, Ontario
416-285-6626

**+100 locations in Canada and 4 in the United States


Last night my family and I celebrated my sister's birthday with a trip to our local East Side Marios. I suggested the all-you-can-eat ridiculousness of Scarborough's Frankie Tomato's, but it was shot down early in the suggestions process. In retrospect I'm glad, because when put into all-you-can-eat situations, it brings out my inner Takeru Kobayashi, and I tend to overdo it. I don't see "all you can eat" as a value, as much as a challenge, and gluttony induced hospital visits are no way to celebrate the birthday of a family member.

So, East Side Marios it was.

I don't go to East Side Marios very often, and every time I go it seems to be different from the last. They seem to be a restaurant chain with a identity crisis. Initially they seemed to be something of a broke-ass Olive Garden, and then they expanded their menu and sort of Jack Astorized themselves. Now it appears they've tried to redact their jackastorism and classy up their menu, a la the Pickle Barrel. The reason I mention this is with all the shake-ups, they've removed chicken fingers from the menu. Chicken Fingers! I think every restaurant in the world should have to serve chicken fingers by law, just for picky children and guys like me. See, I generally enjoy simpler cuisine, so when in a fancy (or trying to appear fancy) restaurant, my unwillingness to try new things finds me defaulting to chicken fingers, which are often found on the secret "bar menu" that a lot of places have. It's pretty hard to mess up chicken fingers, I reason. But in East Side Mario's haste to appeal to classy mall shoppers, they've let them fall by the way side. People often claim that the Chinese character for "Crisis" is the same as the one for "opportunity" (which isn't true, but never let the truth get in the way of a good saying). Those Chinese are fucking onto something!

So with that in mind I ordered up a Burger, iPhone camera in hand, and thought "well, at least I can write a review for Angela's site, finally".

"Quit bullshitting. How was it?" you ask? Hold on, I'll tell you. Relax. Jeez...

It was actually delicious. The meat was juicy and the bun was warm but not crispy, the lettuce was just the right amount to give it crunch but not fall all over the place. It came served with Tomatoes, but I removed them as they're forged in the lowest rung of hell by the devil himself (which, you'd think would make them taste awesome, but I guess Satan has better taste in music than food).

So there you have it, for a place thats generally tethered to a mall and is primarily known for pasta and singing Joe Pesci lookalikes can actually make a good burger.

-Matt

Mini-burgers

December is always packed with holiday parties. Holiday parties = hors d'oeuvres...if you happen to be at a party with lots of hors d'oeuvres going around, there's bound to be mini-hamburgers in the mix. Hamburgler and I spotted these last night - his review was simply:

"WHERE'S THE CHEESE????!" :(

He then proceeded to hound the waiters, and ate 4 more mini-burgers.

Thank you.

PATRICIAN GRILL
219 King Street East
Toronto, ON
(416) 366-4841


Last night was a mission to find Lindsay Lohan in Toronto. During which, we drank a lot...rendering me completely hungover today. The office has started this new thing where we have Family Lunch Day once a week together - thank goodness we chose today to do it!

We decided on cheeseburgers from the Patrician Grill. It's roughly a 3 minute walk from the office, so Rita and I went to pick lunch up for everyone. The place itself is a super retro, authentic diner, complete with old menus, brown bench booths, and a beige rotary phone. The menu stated that all their hamburgers are homemade, and grilled - and are they ever! It was super tasty, flavourful, and so filling. Though topped with processed cheese slices, I found it to be rather delicious.

This cheeseburger turned my feeling like a 4, into feeling like a 7. I still don't feel amazing by any means, but this surely boosted me up for sure! :)

LOVE!!

THE DRAKE HOTEL
1150 Queen Street West
Toronto, Ontario
(416) 531-5042


Jayme has been raving about the Drake Hotel hamburgers forever now. It seems everyone I know loves going to the Drake, but I had never gone until this afternoon. We both ordered the Drake Burger, which is a hamburger topped with aged white cheddar, smoked bacon, and russian dressing; served with handcut french fries, and coleslaw (which I did not eat). I don't need to give any fancy description about this burger, except for IT'S GODDAMN AMAZING!!! So juicy and fresh, the bun was soft, the meat practically melted in your mouth...and i don't know what 'russian dressing' specifically is, but it's pretty tangy and tasty.

Please, take yourself out to the Drake Hotel immediately, and try one of their burgers. This may have just taken over the top spot for my favorite burger in Toronto!

How to make a Breakfast Burger:

I came up with this idea this morning while I was scrambling (get it? ZING!) to find something to make for breakfast! Forged out of brimstone and hellfire - one spicy little breakfast burger was born!

Here's what you do - get that burger (I used a cheese and bacon fuzed variety) cooking up in a frying pan on medium heat. Put a lid over that shit so it doesn't dry out, son! Next up you throw your bread in the toaster oven and get that process started.

Next step is a fast tricky one! Get the burger on the toast and have it melting the cheese slice. Here is where you fry up your egg - I suggest over medium - so you get a bit of runny mess but not too much! Add ketchup, hot sauce, mustard or whatever else you fancy! Mmmmmmmm!

- Pare

Double Rhino review!

RHINO BAR & GRILL, INC.
1249 Queen Street West
Toronto, Ontario
(416) 535-8089


Funnily enough, I spent the weekend hanging out with my friend Rhino, then Sunday night rolls around, and Stephanie and I decided to go eat at a place called Rhino. Anyhoos...

For starters, I had NO idea that they even served food here. I was a bit skeptical, 'cause I never really fancied this place to begin with (I even used to live directly across the street from it, and never ever went). I decided to order their hamburger, because nothing else on the menu seemed appealing.

Side note: As soon as our food came, i got up to reach to another table to get the pepper. The tablecloth was caught under my leg, and I nearly pulled both of our dinners off the table, and spilt my beer everywhere!

The first few bites were alright, but then the more I ate, the less impressed I was. It was very well done, which left no room for juiciness or flavor. I mean, it wasn't the worst thing I've ever had, but nothing to write home about...I also wasn't very hungry, so didn't really eat that much anyway.

In all honesty, we were originally supposed to go to the Beaconsfield for dinner, but when we got there, there was a big yellow sign on their front doors explaining that their liquor license had been suspended. Jerks.



STEPHANIE'S PLAIN (MEAT-AND-BUN ONLY) REVIEW:

The Rhino burger is a homemade burger, which I love, and mine was grilled to perfection. It was delectably juicy enough, but also dry enough so that it wasn't spitting at me when I chewed. I can't tell if it was Angus or Sirloin or any of that, but I can say that it was bursting with amazingly delicious hamburger flavour! I didn't want to stop eating it, I could've eaten that hamburger all night. The portion size was just right: enough to fill me up but not so much that i needed to unzip my pants!

The fries, however, could use some work.

- Stephanie

Spicy!

SADIE'S DINER & JUICE BAR
504 Adelaide Street West
Toronto, Ontario
416-777-2343


The other day I went to Sadie's Diner And Juice Bar for lunch. I met Justin and Lyndsey there and we all talked shit and ate. They both decided to get buritos - but obviously I got a burger!

The burger was really spicy! I love that! It was awesome how they cooked the jalapenos right on top - they leaked spicy juice all into the cheese. Mmmmmmm! The burger was perfectly cooked - not at all dry - which is how most veggie burgers turn out. I don't get to eat at Sadie's very often since I work such odd hours - so this burger was extra special.

FYI, Sadies have sort of wonky hours:
7:30am - 5:00pm Monday - Tuesday
7:30am - 10:00pm Wednesday - Friday
9:00am - 10:00pm Saturday
9:00am - 4:00pm Sunday

-Pare

Ann's Snack Bar

ANN'S SNACK BAR
1615 Memorial Drive
Atlanta, GA 30317


Ann's Snack Bar has been around for close to 40 years now. Somehow it took until early this year for me to even hear about it. From what I had heard it's comparable to the famous "Soup Nazi" that everyone remembers from "Seinfeld". She has rules posted that you must follow or she will get on your case. She is a sweet lady, and I did witness her getting on to a few people (one person didn't close the door behind them, another was leaning on the glass and the third talked on his cellphone).
Her 8 rules are:

Please do not...
1. Lay or lean on counter
2. Consume alcohol or smoke in snack bar
3. Sit or stand babies on counter
4. Illegally park in lot
5. Allow children to slide on rails
6. Stand at counter if seats are available
7. Curse in Snack Bar
8. No shoes - no shirt - no service

Overall, that's not too much to ask of anyone.

I had heard you can wait in line for hours before you can go inside to sit and order your food. I decided to show up around 11:15am to check this place out to hopefully avoid any long wait. I got there and there were already 4 people waiting on the patio. Once 11:30 hit, we walked in and each of us grabbed one of the eight stools at the bar and took a seat. "Miss Ann" then started at one end taking orders and once everyone's order was taken, she got to cooking. I decided to order the "World Famous Ghetto Burger". Her kitchen consist of an electric stove (not unlike one at your own home), 2 small flat top grills (one for meat, one for toasting buns), one deep fryer and a refrigerator (again, just like you have at home).

Once the food was almost ready, she served everyone their fries. She let's you season them the way you want them. She gives you salt, pepper and seasoning mix. Then you watch her build the burgers. This was a bun with ketchup, mustard, and mayo, followed by a layer of chili, then topped with 2 American cheese-covered patties with grilled onions that had been cooking on the burger for nearly the whole time the burger was cooking, and finally your bacon, lettuce and tomato. It comes to you already cut in half, served on a styrofoam plate, with a plastic fork and knife. This burger was huge, practically taking up the entire plate. I stared for a few minutes trying to figure out exactly how to eat this thing. Finally, opting for the fork and knife route. The burger was amazing, the seasoning, the juiciness, everything. I know it doesn't necessarily look fantastic, but trust me... it is.

All in all, if you're in the Atlanta area, go check it out. I'd advise getting there early or be prepared to wait in line. It's worth it. She's been rated by Citysearch as best hamburger in Atlanta in 2006 and 2007 and Best Burger in America in 2007 by the Wall Street Journal.

-Bobby!

ahahahahaha!

My friend Nathan Hazard is amazing! This was his halloween costume. So perfect!
He's got a delicious food blog as well. Check it out here!

SMOKIE MOUNTAIN BURGERS

MC CUTCHAN'S BRASS GRILL RESTAURANT
Fine Dining In The Smokies
710 Parkway (Highway 321)
Gatlinburg, Tennessee
865-463-4168


I spent the past few days down South in Gatlinburg, Tennessee for my friend's wedding. It's a beautiful, really fun place, with tons of touristy things to do, as well as homemade candy places everywhere and good restaurants - including Mc Cutchan's Brass Grill Restaurant. We were happily greeted by a man named Jim; who, upon checking out their website, is the owner!. He immediately struck up a conversation with us about his 41 month old son (when are you supposed to stop counting months?), and was convinced I was from New Orleans.

That aside, we were all hungry...

I was originally going to order the Smokie Mountain burger, but wasn't feeling the bacon. Instead, I got the Sirloin Steak burger with pepperjack cheese. What a treat! It was juicy, flavourful and the spiciness of the cheese was perfect! I wasn't a huge fan of the waffle fries, but who really cares?

I was completely satisfied, and pleasantly full.

If you ever happen to be in Gatlinburg for any reason, you should go to this sweet little pub. Surely Jim will be there to greet you as well, and tell you all about his kid....by then, perhaps he'd be 52 months? Ugggh....

Royal Avec Cheese - Paris!

McDONALDS
Paris, France


When I found out that I was going to Paris all I could think about was getting one of these under my belt! I know what you are thinking - ohh big deal - they mention it in Pulp Fiction or that it's just a name change blah blah.

But until you have one you can't say shit. This thing is the king of all McDonald burgers. Trust me I have eaten McDonalds in over 10 countries. In the Royal Avec Cheese they use real beef - hand packed stuff - not patties! And it was so fresh and hot, and larger than any McDonalds cheesburger here!

-Pare

Room service - London, UK

KENSINGTON HOTEL
109-113 Queen’s Gate, South Kensington
London, UK, SW7 5LR
+44 (0) 207 589 6300


After a long night of drinking pints at the local Dirty Dicks pub in the Kensignton area of London I developed quite the burger hunger! All day I was talking about burgers - and the time was soon coming. On my way up to my room I couldn't find my key to the room - so I had to go all the way back down to the front desk. Needless to say this wasn't helping my BHS (Burger Hunger Situation) - come on! I know you all have found yourselves in a serious BHS!

Anyway, I ended up ordering my burger downstairs while I waited for a new key. I got the key and went up to my room. In the elevator there was a couple visiting from Germany and they kept looking over at me everytime my stomach would groan! "Too much beer - not enough burgers" I mumbled.

10min later the burger arrived! I could hardly wait! I rushed it in to my bed and dug in! It was an odd burger - but tasted like heaven. As you can see from the photo - the burger was cut in half and on a long crusty bun. There was a two blend of melted cheese and red onions (I don't usually go for onions but at this point in the night I could care less). As a final attempt to Xzibitafy my burger I threw a few fries and the salad on there too!

- Pare

No thanks...

THE SHIP & ANCHOR PUB
5975 Roswell Rd NE
Sandy Springs, GA 30328
(404) 256-3550
www.shipandanchorpub.com


After a long day of helping soon-to-be-roommates in our new house, I went out to The Ship & Anchor Pub to meet up with an old roommate who was in town. We decided to go there due to it's fairly small crowd, decent prices and the fact we both knew where it was and was a good halfway point for us to meet.

Having worked up an appetite, I decided to give one of their burgers a shot. I ordered what they call The Georgian, a hamburger with barbecue sauce, grilled onions and cheddar and monterey jack cheeses. First off, the onions were a little off in taste...little too sweet and soggy. They were sliding right out the back of the burger (which, i guess do to their poor quality, actually was a good thing). The burger came off as very dry and flavorless. It had that, frozen patty, taste to it as well. Possibly even pre-cooked, frozen taste. It was that or they did just overcook it. Who knows, maybe both!

I would definitely recommend avoiding the burgers, I'm sure they've got something good food-wise there, but of course you can't go wrong with the drinks and the Internet Jukebox which gives you quite a variety of music to listen to.

- Bobby!

More from Natalie!

HERO CERTIFIED BURGERS
18 locations all around Toronto
The best veggie burger hands down in the city of Toronto goes to Hero Burger. With an array of topping choices, this delicious veggie burger hits the spot everytime! The texture and flavour are unparalelled anywhere else.

LICK'S HOMEBURGERS AND ICE CREAM
25 locations throughout Ontario
Coming in at a close second is Lick's Homeburgers and Ice Cream. Again, you can choose your favourite toppings (highly recommend the GUK, despite the name) I always order mine well done to ensure that the patty doesn't fall apart as the consistency is sometimes a bit crumbly

Both are totally satisfying options!
This is the veggie burger correspondant signing out for today - tune in next time for the best veggie burgers in Philly!
- Natalie


P.S. Natalie also sent me this fun photo from Ian's cow Website, that's a cow made of veggie burgers. Cute!

If interested, here's his website:
http://www.gallaugher.com/ian/IansCowWebsite.html

Pretty tasty, mister!

MR.TASTY'S
348 Queen Street East
Toronto, ON
(416) 863-0633


Michelle sent me a message tipping me off to Mr.Tasty's on Queen East. Apparently the burgers there are pretty good. I've always been a little weary of that place, since the area is pretty sketchy. However, I trust Michelle, and work about a 10 minute walk from here, so I will definitely mosey over for lunch one afternoon.

Until then, the best I can do is relay how delicious Michelle thought it was!!

Thanks lady :)

Burger wraps!

GRAPEFRUIT MOON
968 Bathurst Street
Toronto, ON
M5R 3G6
(416) 534-9056


OK!
To make up for my terrible hamburger experience the other day, I needed to give it another shot. Christina and I decided to treat ourselves to dinner at our favorite little cozy restaurant, Grapefruit Moon. They specialize in vegetarian and vegan dishes, but also have some rather tasty meat selections. Their hamburger is called a "Rudy's Wrap", and is such a perfect balance of bread to meat ratio. It's always hard to find that, but with a burger being wrapped in a toritilla, it works perfectly. The burger is topped with lettuce, brie and roasted red peppers - you don't even need to add anything else to it, though I did dip it in ketchup.

Absolutely delicious!!
I've had this before, but today's mighty burger wrap was better than ever!

I totally suggest eating here. If not for their burgers, but for their welcoming atmosphere, organic brewed beers, and friendly service :)

:(

BETTY'S
240 King Street East
Toronto, Ontario
M5A 1K1
416-368-1300



I haven't eaten a delicious hamburger, or any hamburger for that matter for over a month. I've been on hamburger-hiatus, if you will, due to my stomach ripping apart constantly. So for the past month, I've not been allowed to consume any red meat :( However, yesterday I got the OK to go ahead again.

I went for lunch this afternoon with my friend Kay - we opted for Betty's, a pub a few doors down from my office that's usually filled with business people grabbing a mid-afternoon/after work pint. I was excited to have a hamburger, with swiss cheese on top. The burger was WAY too hot when it came, that every bite I took was just shooting steam into my mouth. It sucked. Once it cooled off to a good eating temperature, it wasn't any better. There weren't any noticeable spices or good flavoring to it, and it was dry and grey. I barley finished half of it.

For always getting such good reviews of their food, I'd suggest to just stick to their beer. It's simple, and kinda hard to eff up, especially when you order a it in a bottle.

p.s. The spinach salad I got as my side was basically a caesar salad, with spinach instead of romaine. wtf?!

p.p.s. We also decided to try the Pumpkin Cream Cheese Cake Brownie for dessert. There was no cream-cheesiness to it at all. It was nothing but a dense pumpkin muffin with a fancier name. Betty, what's wrong?

$$$$$$$$$$$

WINDSOR ARMS HOTEL
18 St. Thomas Street
Toronto Ontario
M5S 3E7
416-971-9666



One of the best burgers I have ever had was at a tiny small town corner diner called Keith’s in Fonthill Ontario.  My parents would pile us into their 1979 Ford LTD and drive up the Escarpment into rural Niagara to see autumn in all its glory (keep in mind that this is during a time when we still had 4 distinct seasons and well before I spent my weekends drinking and playing video games).  The drive would span most of an afternoon and we would stop occasionally for my mother to buy antique teapots or the kids to pick out Halloween pumpkins to carve.  The trip would always end at the same corner in the same pitstop of a town for a burger some fries and a slice of lemon meringue pie. I was only 5 but the memories of that place and time stuck with me all these years and not because of some hokey Norman Rockwell bullshit like  ‘those are the moments that shape you for years to come because my parents loved me and I got to spend valuable family time in the back seat of a car that if you had put a sail on it, the B52’s would have been right and yes it would have set sail.’  No, It was the burger that I crave and remember to this day and not the cheddar cheesy family moments. MMMMM cheddar cheese.

Fast-forward 25 years.  Four overworked (Nick isn’t really overworked but for the sake of the story we’ll keep that a secret), hung over friends had a few hours to kill before rehearsals for their world tour began*.  These four brave men decided to visit North Toronto (yes I use a lot of brackets and yes, to us, Bloor Street is North Toronto) and the palace that is the Windsor Arms Hotel.  Describing this place as a palace is not much of an exaggeration. 4 million dollars worth of cars parked in front, wood paneling, fine flooring, high ceilings with gaudy chandeliers, deadly serious staff that come out of nowhere to help you within moments of entering and the general stench of high society.  I once heard a story from a cousin that she was in the piano bar for afternoon tea and Robin Williams was getting bombed on tequila shots, took over the piano began belting out tunes and then when he was too trashed to play anymore decided to dance on the tables.  Its hard pressed to believe that members of the Royal Family would be prone to public drunken outbursts on this level so I guess my palace analogy is out the window but my new point is that the staff let him do his thing.  No polite interruption, no large security guards escorting him out.  They just let him sing and dance and that’s just the kind of place that it is.

We sat down @ 2:15 which is a down time considering the kitchen closes at 3:00pm.  There was a couple behind us meeting with a wedding coordinator planning their big day and four society chicks with perfect posture sitting at the bar sipping white wine, well overdressed for the time of day.  We wore t-shirts and jeans and I had my sunglasses on.  Ever seen the scene in Blues Brothers when Jake and Elwood go to the fancy pants restaurant to try to convince Mr. Fabulous that they need his horn back in the band**?  Anyways, we sat down, ordered drinks, ordered burgers with cheese (either stilton, cheddar or swiss) and fries on the side.

At this point you’re thinking ‘this guy has written 750 words and hasn’t yet mentioned the burger and included 300 words of him rambling about his childhood, what’s the fucking point?’  Well here’s here it is.  There is absolutely nothing similar between Keith’s in Fonthill Ontario and Prime at the Windsor Arms Hotel in North Toronto EXCEPT that they both have an exceptional burger. I’m not a fancy pants, I do however have a huge amount of respect for an uppity millionaires hangout that can take a simple staple of North American cuisine and treat as just that, a simple time honored traditional meal and not fuck with it like I know some douchebag uber-chef would.  The bread was daily fresh, not heavy and not overly seeded.  The cheese was generous enough to add rich flavor but not too much that it caused nasty grease to drip all over the place. The fixins’ were a full fresh very green leaf of Boston lettuce and a small round of thinly sliced red onion.  Mustard, ketchup and mayonnaise were served on the side.  The meat itself was almost too generous, measuring in the 15oz post cooked neighborhood.  And god damn was it tasty.  Fresh prime rib, ground into the densest and juiciest burger I have ever had the pleasure of destroying.  At one point I had to stop and wipe the juices from my forearms because the burger had bled that far.  Sweet heavenly beef!



The Results:

Burger Rating: 9.2/10.0

Service: 9.0/10.0

Value: 8.0/10.0

The total for 4 people (4 burgers, 2 pints Stella, 2 glasses red wine, 2 Crown Royal, 2 bottles Evian water, tax and tip) =  $184!  Yeah I could get 59 McDonalds burgers and a large Coke for that price but I’d have to listen to some drunken cunts with fake tits talk about how hot they are while I’m in line and I just can’t deal with that shit.  A $17 burger is a bit over the top but you gotta pay for quality.

- MARC MC CHEESE

More Mini-Burgers:

MILESTONES
Yonge & Dundas Square
(plus other fine establishments across the nation)


As an avid protester of anything and everything onion, I was sceptical about these tiny burgers at first. They were described by the lovely Stephanie as Kobe beef patties, cheese, onion 'strings' (which I was assured were different from onions and would not affect my burger experience), and mustard, all in a 3-bite-sized package. I have to reluctantly admit that the first bite won me over with ease. The buns were so nice and crispy, grilled with some kind of oil, the beef was tender and juicy, although quite different from your typical hamburger beef, and the onions were barely noticeable, as advertized.

Four and half...hamburger patties out of five?

Matthew Nixon

Magically delicious

BIG SKY CAFE
1121 Broad St
San Luis Obispo, CA
93401

In the world of vegetarian burgers, there are 2 types: the ones that try to taste like "hamburgers" and the types that don't, but are simply shaped to fit on a burger bun. At Big Sky Cafe, I think I have found the mecca of the rare 3rd type - the fucking delicious one.

First off, let's look at the menu description, shall we?

VEGETARIAN BEAN BURGER - (vegan) tofu, pinto beans and black beans mixed with oats, salsa & rice. Served on a wheat bun with lettuce, vine-ripened tomatoes and roasted tomatillo salsa .....$8.95

If a Mexican was a vegan, he would want to be buried underneath the kitchen at the Big Sky Cafe in San Luis Obispo.

Never have I seen such a unique combination of ingredients formed into a half inch patty and placed on round bread. And speaking of bread, it wasn't just a wheat bun made for the complaining douchebags over starches and carbs, but made as if wheat was the ONLY kind of bread a real human would have. It was crunchy on the top like a bowl of rice krispies, but so soft in the middle you thought it was cotton candy. And I'm not sure what kind of special powers vines have over tomatoes, but they should certainly be allowed to leave Hogwarts more often.

If you ever have the glorious chance to drive along the coast of California, and are craving something of the local land, hit up Big Sky and douse your troubles with a VB Burger.

- Siobhan
Californian Veggie Connoisseur

ewwwww.......

So, a week or so ago, we had a group of guys get together for a bachelor party for our friend, Jesse. We decided to go out to eat at a well-known Atlanta restaurant, The Vortex. The Vortex has been voted in the weekly newspaper, Creative Loafing, as having the best burger in Atlanta every year since 1993. I don't know if I could agree as the BEST, but definitely top 5. Anyways, they offer a burger known as the Double Bypass burger. Everyone was trying to get someone to order it, but no one felt up for it. I decided later to avoid the $15 price tag on it and just make it at home. Maybe the actual burger wasn't as good as The Vortex, but it gave me a good idea of what this monster would taste like. The Double Bypass consists of an 8 oz. burger (your choice of a beef, bison, turkey or black bean patty. I used turkey.), 4 slices of good ol' American cheese, 4 slices of bacon and a fried egg. Oh, did I mention the bun is replaced with 2 grilled cheese sandwiches? yeah… So once this was completely done, I dove in. This thing is about 5 or 6 inches tall, so on first bite, I missed the patty all together and it tasted like a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich. I continued consuming this surreal burger and it was phenomenal. So juicy, so cheesy, so bacony… so ridiculous. I did have to pace myself, as overwhelming as it was, but I made it through and finished after taking a couple of breaks. Overall, if you are very hungry, and don't plan on doing anything for at least 2 hours and are up for a challenge… this burger is for you. Maybe I should try The Luther Burger next time…

-bobby

If at all interested, the Vortex can be found at:
878 Peachtree Street
Atlanta, GA.
30309

OR

438 Moreland Avenue
Atlanta, GA.
30307

Thanks Maggie!

MAGGIE BROWN
455 Myrtle Avenue
Brooklyn, New York
11205


Saturday was basically a hurricane in New York City, so we decided to leave Manhattan, and just hangout in Brooklyn for the night. As soon as we got home, Carly was like "Okay! We are ordering Maggie Browns!". Everyone placed their orders, and Jeff braved the wind and rain to pick it up from around the corner for us. First of all, the fries were a mistake - it was supposed to be a side of mac n' cheese (which Maggie's so glady gave us additionally for free when we called them back!) I ordered my hamburger 'medium', with swiss cheese and avocados. I still find it so weird that only in America they ask you how you want your hamburger cooked. I thought for some reason that hamburger was a regulated thing, and always had to be cooked well done. In any case, it was way less cooked than medium! I bit in to see bright pink, and was instantly freaked out! Everyone reassured me that it was fine, so I continued eating (obviously). It kept getting more and more rare near the center, but was still pretty good. I couldn't finish eating it though, since I was already filled with beer before eating, as well as still a little concerned about possibly getting sick from it.

Overall, I was happy with Maggie Brown's, although would like to try their hamburger a little more cooked next time. I'd also like to go to the restaurant itself, since they seemed so nice over the phone, and apparently have Happy Hour with 2 for 1 draft beers daily.

Definitely a cute little gem in Clinton Hill.


EDIT:
i just realized that I actually have been to Maggie Brown's before! About a month ago I was in Brooklyn, and my friend John and I went there for lunch and a drink. I didn't eat anything, but I really love how the place looked. Amazing textured wallpaper, and a really weird waiter who forgot we were even there...all good though!

Wendy's abomination!

WENDY'S
6000 restaurants worldwide!


Approximately once every other month, I take a drive up to Ottawa for a weekend visit.  Back when I lived in Montreal, I would travel the 401 to native Toronto at least once a month, and traipse the 2hr expanse between Montreal and Ottawa on a bi-weekly basis.  Road trips in my adult life are frequent and plenty.

Within this time of travel, I would always - without fail - stop at one of the many cookie cutter rest-stops littered alongside the highways.  Without fail, I'd consume more than my fair share of fast food and without fail, I'd be excited as Gary Glitter in a toy store.

So when an enthusiastic Ms. Holmes approached me about doing a review, I could not help but wonder why none of the fast-food burger shacks along these well travelled roads hadn't been subject to review.  I mean, sure, McDicks was recently dissected.  But It's not the same as making a mission of rest-stop food. There is indeed a perceived and yes, delusional difference between eating Mickey D's for lunch on a hump day than there is eating it at a pit stop.  And since, the glorious Golden Arches have already been subject of review, I'd figure I'd hone in on a personal favorite - the Wendy's Triple Decker.

I should preface this critique first by stating that of the fast food burger magnates, Wendy's ranks as my favorite.  This is squarely based on me not feeling like shit - both literally and figuratively - after sucking back a burg (as much as I love Big Macs, I will say this:  they slide out your ass faster than you can say poop). Shit value notwithstanding, Wendy's also doesn't really make you subconsciously feel like a mid-western pile of shit like a McDonalds or Burger King does.

Okay, so the Triple Decker.  This burger isn't really for the faint of heart.  With three square patties, cheese, trimmings and an extra order of bacon, the flagship 3D (get it? Triple D?)  weighs in at a hefty 3lbs.  Okay maybe not 3 lbs.  That could be a bold face lie.  But shit's heavy.  And not only heavy, but it gushes grease and juices out every corner upon every squeeze.  Its theatrics alone are enough to ward away the weak.

Unlike the BK's and the MCD's, Wendy burgers actually taste and feel like well...real meat (this could also attribute to the non-white trash feeling many get after scarfing down a Whopper).  Fast food's authenticity has never been a point of contention with me, but it's definitely a cherry on top when the meat is actually meat.  it's kind of the same way we look at the Canadian Olympic team:  our expectations aren't very high, but when someone does achieve higher than the bar, we bathe in all its glory to make us feel good.

Unfortunately I didn't feel good an hour after eating this thing thus rendering my initial paradigm useless like tits on a nun. I felt like I swallowed a baby who shat its diapers. The mammoth of a burger never sat well in my stomach and although I did hold her in till we got to Ottawa, the aftermath wasn't pretty. I basically gave birth to Biggie. A big black mess left my ass and that kind of spoiled the elation and sense of accomplishment that swept me when I was eating it. It kind of bummed me out. It deflated me and crushed my burger ego. Note to anyone: fast food burgers - delicious or not - are mounds of processed crap. And processed crap doesn't make you feel hot. They just make you birth black babies.

- chenyip

Homemade goodness!

Oh hi there...

Being the last weekend of the summer, Christina and I decided to have a bbq this afternoon, and I homemade hamburgers for us. Not to blow my own horn here, but they were super delicious, and a perfect meal for such a hot, sunny holiday Monday. I would love to give you the actual recipe, but the way I cook is all about experimenting. No recipes required...

However, today I used:

- 1lbs. of extra lean ground beef
- 1 egg
- 1 sleeve of soda crackers
- tons of black pepper
- worcestershire sauce (very important!)
- hot sauce (all I had was Franks Chili Lime sauce, which worked surprisingly well!)
- a giant clove of garlic

Squish everything together with your hands, form into 4 patties, then bbq those guys up! If you have some time to let them sit in the fridge for a bit first, they'll absorb all the flavors a little more. Either way though, so yummy!! I got these really fresh baked garlic and rosemary buns to put the hamburgers in. All we had were cheese slices, which I felt a little disappointed paring with this, however it worked out for the best!



*If you have any good hamburger recipes to boast about, please let me know, and I will post!

A Classic

MCDONALDS
everywhere in the universe...


Just for the record, I only eat McDonalds once a year - when my brother and I are coming home from Warped Tour. We didn't eat there this year, so it was acceptable (kind of) to have it last night. I would also like to point out that everyone was drunk and needed emergency food...

I got the Quarter Pounder with cheese, of course. It's as gross/as delicious as always. I'm not going to recommend anyone to eat here, 'cause it's so bad for you. But really, at the same time, they have been around forever and are okay to have once in a while.

Why oh why are you so deliciously disgusting, McDonalds??

Flavour Infused Burgers!

THE HEALTHY BUTCHER
565 Queen Street West
Toronto, ON

1.
2.
3.


Tonight was a particularity special night for hamburgers. Juligwar always hosts the best bbq's, and likes to treat his guests to the delicious wonders of the Healthy Butcher. Everything I've ever tasted from them has been amazing (minus the cilantro burger...'cause really, who actually likes cilantro?) - These burgers were Hempseed and Mozzarella infused beef. Infused is basically another word for DELICIOUS! I topped this burger with some lettuce and a bit of ketchup, but I was instantly regretting it. You could easily eat their hamburgers with nothing at all on them, and they'd still be the most succulent thing you've ever home-grilled!

Healthy Butcher is a 4/5 always!
(again, only 4/5 on account of the cilantro burgers!)

P.S. I forgot to mention...Juligwar specifically said to mention he also gave 'service with a smile'. What a nerd.

Bison?

C'EST WHAT?
67 Front Street East
Toronto, Ontario


I went to C'est What? with a friend tonight. Instead of the regular Lamburger that I usually order (I've actually never ordered anything else ever, since it's so good), I decided to venture off and try the Buffalo Burger. Bison, huh? I've eaten bison once, and it was delicious, however this wasn't amazing - good - but not amazing. The addition of garlic mayo was a nice touch though! My yam fries were cut funny tonight, and were super greasy...but back to the bison - overall, it was ok. But in all honesty, as I was eating it, I was secretly wishing I was eating the lamburger my friend had ordered :(

Olympos in honour of the Olympics!

OLYMPOS CROW BAR & GRILL
Adelaide & Princess Street (Southwest corner)


Olympos provides a great homemade burg. Only problem is processed cheese. Otherwise, great bang for your buck and I'm pretty sure the restaurant itself hasn't changed at all since the 80s.

- The Hamburgler.

follow up!

DUMONT BURGER
314 Bedford Ave.
Brooklyn, New York
(Cross Street: Between S 1st Street and S 2nd Street)


angela!!!!

so the place in Brooklyn with the imposter "veggie burger" is called
DUMONT BURGER

apparently, they do have a killer Hamburger

hasta la proxima...

natalie
the veggie burger correspondent

Meet Natalie:

Natalie is a dear friend of mine from Toronto, who is temporarily residing in Brooklyn, New York. She was so excited about the birth of hamblogger, that she immediately asked to be my veggie burger correspondent. I received an enthusiastic ichat message from her this afternoon that read:


"here are my first notes on veggie burgers...

1. best veggie burger in toronto - it is a tie between that place on tecumseth and queen and lick's

2. there is a place in brooklyn that is committing veggie burger crimes - they are claiming that they serve a veggie burger when in fact it is a falafel on a bun!

i was outraged!
more to come..."


I wanted to ask her more questions about this, like "what restaurant in brooklyn?" and "i have no idea what place on queen this is. please explain!". However, she was gone just as quick as she came, and was marked as 'offline'.

One day I will have the followup to this conversation.
For now, I am happy knowing that Natalie is active in wanting to be a part of this!

meh...

Where:
TATTOO ROCK PARLOR
567 Queen Street West
Toronto, Ontario


Last night we went to a special event at Tattoo Rock Parlor. I have heard rave reviews of their food, but have never tried it before, so I was excited when these mini-hamburgers were brought out. To my disappointment, they were overcooked, and the buns were difficult to bite through. Granted these are just party burgers, I don't think I would like to try a full hamburger from there. Sorry guys.

do you love hamburgers...even hamburgers with cheese - aka - cheeseburgers.

this blog will be reviews (good and bad) of hamburgers/cheeseburgers/veggie burgers from all over the place, including where in the world to find these delights.